The Best and Worst Parts of Living on My Own.

living alone good bad

I’ve been living on my own since May. It’s been a whole summer of T time. B and I moved in together in the spring of 2015 and we’ve lived together ever since. I had roommates every year in college and then lived at home before. I’ve never truly lived alone until now, but it’s been an incredible and healthy experience. There’s so many positive things that have come out of living alone, but it hasn’t all been rainbows and butterflies. Let’s get real, some things are amazing, but some things feel kind of pathetic and sad.

The Good

I’m an independent lady who makes her own plans and schedule. Being on my own makes my schedule more flexible for cancellations or plan changes altogether. If I want to go to the movies by myself in the middle of my day off, I do it. I can take my time walking around Target, browsing for a couple of hours even if I’m only there for packing tape.

My cleaning habits have become way better. B and I usually share the responsibility of household chores, but since it’s just me maintaining our place, I have to be really diligent about it. Being a slob sucks, so I’ve started cleaning in the mornings before I start getting ready for work and incorporating small chores into my night routine. Plus, I’m currently trying out this process where if a task takes less than 5 minutes, you do it immediately. It’s been surprisingly helpful!

I’m becoming more responsible in general. I’m more diligent about paying my bills on time. I meal plan most of the time so I can make sure I’m eating meals that won’t upset my stomach or spike my sugar. Basically, I’m taking better care of myself. I take more time for myself. Nothing is better than self care. And I’m not saying that in a way to imply self care cures my depression or something. It makes me feel better some days and is a reminder I need to take care of myself. I don’t know why it took me living on my own for me to realize if I don’t take care of myself, no one else will. Here are some things I do when I’m not sure what to do for myself.

The Sad

When I’m anxious (which I often am), there’s no one at home to help me relax or distract myself. And by no one, I mean B. I love being on my own and having Tara time, but I miss having my best friend around.

Sometimes I make too much food and there’s no one here to help me finish it. That’s not a real problem. I could learn to make less food. I could freeze it. I’m just used to having B around to help me make sure nothing goes to waste. We’re both definitely emotional eaters though. Maybe we need to learn to cook for two more strictly…

The other half of our bed becomes a storage area for headphones, my ipad, tv remotes, sometimes clean laundry. There’s nothing quite like rolling over and accidentally turning on the tv only to fry your retinas.

If I’m not feeling well, I’m on my own. For example, I goofed up my ankle last Wednesday and have been struggling since. I’ve had B’s amazing family for support and company, but I don’t want to burden them with my situation. I guess I don’t want to burden B either, but when B broke his foot last year, I was still there to make him comfortable and keep our household going. Now I’m flying solo and I miss his comforting company more than anything because I’m in pain. I’m still managing and feeling better right now, but it’s hard to handle it on my own. I’ve never had to deal with  health issue like this on my own before.

-Tara Joy


13 thoughts on “The Best and Worst Parts of Living on My Own.

  1. TheMakeupCase17

    After I moved out of my parents house, I moved in with my then boyfriend. We broke up 2 years later (and I kicked him out) & a friend moved in with me. Big mistake. I hated having a roommate. Needless to say, this girl & I aren’t friends anymore (for a plethora of reasons). I’ve lived by myself 2003. I actually enjoy it. I’m an only child, so I grew up used to doing things on my own. I love having my privacy. Only downside is when I’m sick I’m sometimes on my own, but my current boyfriend will come over when he can to check on me and hang out for awhile (and he always brings food). Eventually we’re going to move in together, but we need to find the right place that’s big enough so we have our own private spaces to escape to (we both like having our own space but… ).

    1. Tara Joy

      I totally understand where you’re coming from and understand what you mean about having a place with space. Our first place in Florida had an extra room so when we needed alone time we could go off and do our own things. To this day, everywhere we’ve lived has had an extra space for us to have to ourselves. It’s a smart thing to do! My boyfriend is currently working in LA so he isn’t close enough to help me out, but his family does live near me and they’re great support and company.

      -Tara Joy

      1. TheMakeupCase17

        My boyfriend is a musician, so he needs a room for his gear and recording stuff. And I need a room for my makeup and all my crap (baseball & theme park memorabilia). He currently has a 2 bedroom house & I have a 2 bedroom apartment. His plan is to e eventually sell his house and get us a place with at least 3 bedrooms. 😊

      2. Tara Joy

        Aww that’s lovely! My boyfriend and I split our second bedroom and it’s usually an office for us both. A work and makeup area for me and a work and 3d printing station for him!

        -Tara Joy

  2. Pl

    Dear Tara
    It can be the best of times and the worst of times…so glad you have support and company. Been there…
    Best wishes…

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